As I think back through the past 20 years, I realized that I have sat through over 1200 sermons, many of which impacted my life and faith in incredible ways and others that I could have easily slept through. I have heard countless pastors from different denominations each with their own style and voice. I have heard men and women, african-american and caucasian, Baptist and Catholic, young and old, and Conservative and liberal pastors. I have been to large churches as well as small churches. I have countless quotes from several intriguing pastors in a journal as well as many on bulletin inserts.
About a month ago I had the oppotunity to be part of someone elses experiences of different pastors that they heard. I was on the other side of the game. I was the one who allowed the Holy Spirit to convict hearts, transform lives, or to plant a seed of encouragement in a struggling heart. Words from my sermon were probably written in journals or on the offering envelopes that are placed on the back of the pews. Preaching my first sermon was the most humbling experience of my life.
February 5th 2012 was a day that will forever be etched into my heart. The day finally came where for the first time in my life I knew exactly what God wanted me to do with the rest of my life. I finally felt such a sense of peace about calling. God allowed so many people who are dear to my heart give me encouragement as well as affirmation that I am currently walking down the exact path that I am supposed to be! February 5th was a day that will sadly not happen in many Baptist churches for the simple fact that many people would never ask a female to preach in their congregation muchless call them as a senior or even associate pastor.
I was able to preach as part of Martha Stearns Marshall Month of preaching which has been a month where churches ask females to preach during the month of February. This month began in 2007. I hope that one day in my lifetime I will see the time when this month is no longer necessary
because we will move to a place in our churches where a Pastor is not chosen based on gender. I think that this month of preaching is a good way to show the children and teenagers in our churches that they can do whatever they want to in life whether they are a boy or a girl.
It was crazy to realize how much the pastor actually notices as they preach. I could see the people who whispered to their neighbors. I could see when someone reached into their purse to grab a mint. I could see the person nodding off to sleep about midway back in the middle section. I could see the mom trying to contain their restless toddler. And all of that was beautiful. It was beautiful to see our church packed with a little over 300 people. It was beautiful to see people coming together from all walks of life for the same purpose, to worship the creator of the universe and the healer of our brokenness, and the lover of our souls. It was beautiful to see people come forth and pray at the alter; young and old alike came to the alter to offer a gift to God.
As I stood behind the pulpit, I looked into the audience and into the eyes of so many people who have been influential in my spiritual walk. I saw Sunday School teachers, family, friends, and fellow ministers who I have looked up to and respected over the years. I saw people who without their dedication to loving and encouraging me, I wouldn't be where I am today. I saw people who had to show me tough love in order for me to grow-up and leave behind childish ways. I saw friends, no brothers and sisters, from Carson-Newman who have loved me so much over this past year. As I looked into the audience I was reminded of the many memories from my growing up days in Randolph Memorial Baptist Church.
As I glanced to the 4th row on the left hand side of our Sanctuary, I was reminded of the many Sundays of sitting in church with my grandma who had to consistently quiet my brother, my cousins, and myself as we would talk to one another during the worship services. As I led the children's sermon, it brought back memories of my grandmother constantly reminding me to 'sit like a lady' which was the last thing on my mind as I was too busy trying to say the correct answers to my pastors questions. As I glanced to the back of the Sancutary, I chuckled to myself as I remembered the many games of hide and seek and sardines that were played in that sanctuary over the years. I remember coming to revival when Grant Carter was pastor as a child and always listening closely to the sermons even as a small child. I remembered the day that my friends and I decided to get baptized and how we went forward all on the same day to make our decision public and then a few months later entered the waters as our pastor at the time, Mark Beck, baptized us. So many laughs, smiles, and tears were shared in that sanctuary and I am thankful that another memory was made as I was asked to preach my first sermon from the pulpit in which I heard my first sermon 20 years ago.
To everyone who saw leadership and pastoral characteristics in me before I did, thank you for sharing that with me. For those who have been there with me and fumbled through this idea of calling with me, thank you. To Susie Poindexter and Derik Hamby who helped me through the freak out stage of College decisions, thank you. To those of you who kept me in the nursery as a child to those who I am able to share life with now, thank you. For those who have laughed with me, and held me as I cried, thank you!
The road to becoming a pastor is going to be a long one, and I am excited that I have so many people who have been willing to take a chance on me and to look past flaws to see the ministry capabilities in me. Please continue to pray for me and with me as I make deicisions in the next couple of years as far as what grad school to attend and what ministry opportunites to take part in. Continue to pray that churches will open up their doors to me so that I can have the ability to use the gifts that God has given me and to gain more experience.
Thank you Derik for taking a chance on me! Also, in case any of you are interested, I will be preaching on March 11, 2012 at Grace Hills Baptist Church in Appomattox, VA. If you're in the area, I would love for you to come and worship with us, but if you are not in the area, your prayers will be greatly appreciated! Thanks so much to each of my readers for your constant love and encouragement.
Blessings,
Jaime
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Monday, February 13, 2012
My Psalm to God
Tonight we had a speaker come in and talk to us about the lies that we believe and the wounds that can in turn heal us. The speaker was Kary Oberbrunner who is the author of several books, one being "Your Secret Name" which I am currently reading-- and I really encourage you all to read it or atleast check our Oberbrunner and his story. Oberbrunner was once a self-injurer and he told us a little of his story of how God healed him from that. One cool thing that he said tonight that really hit home for me was this, "All sin is self-injury" It doesn't matter if we are a cutter or if we bad mouth our parents, that is all a form of self-injury. He went on to talk about the 'Imposter Sydrome' which I can find myself relating to at times. A lot of the times we walk into the doors of the church only to put on the mask of a perfect Christian and then we leave the building so ashamed that we fear taking off our masks because we fear the rejection that we may receive from people around us. I challenge you today, to be real with God. Tell God your struggles as well as your joys. Tell God what is bothering you and let God heal your deepest wounds. We were challenged tonight to write our own Psalm and I want to share mine with you. Here it is, raw and unedited-- therefore it is not perfect, but was what was on my heart tonight!
My Psalm to God
Mother God, holder of our broken souls, Thank You
Father God, applicator of needed discipline, Thank You
Compassionate Friend, Confidant of our deepest secrets, Thank You
Healing Lord, The One who bandages our scraped knees, Thank You
Beautiful Creator, Molder of our clay selves, Thank You
Sacrificial Lamb, Giver of Your only Son, Thank You
When we see the barren Woman, let us hold her
When we throw selfish tantrums, remain firm
When we see a friend in need, let us be their crying shoulder
When we go to the bedside of the sick, burden our hearts
When we busily glance at the fading sunset, grasp our attention
Teach us to love justice and mercy
Teach us to speak up for those without a voice
Giver of love, peace, joy, patience, kindness, and beauty
For Your fruits of the Spirit, we give thanks
Break the chains of bitterness, shame, fear, guilt, self-hatred, and lonliness.
Thank You
Monday, February 6, 2012
From Brokenness to Blessings (my first sermon)
Hey ya'll in case you didn't get a chance to come to church yesterday morning, here is a copy of my sermon manuscript! =) Hope you take a chance to read it-- or if you don't have the time to read the sermon, I will post the link a little later so that you can listen to the audio version as well!
Will you pray with me, “May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be pleasing in you sight O Lord My God, my rock and my redeemer. Amen”
Have you ever been at a place in your life where you felt absolutely defeated? I’ve been there once. Since most of you know me, you know that I grew up around softball my entire life. Whether it was going to watch my aunt Jennifer or my cousin Lindsay play or playing myself from kindergarten through most of my high school years, I was always at the ball field. Freshman year of high school came and I had gone to just about every softball conditioning there was. I felt as though my tryouts were going well and that I had a pretty good chance of making the team. The last day of tryouts came and went and later that evening I found out that I hadn’t made the team after all. Tears streamed down my face and I felt the most lost and confused I had ever felt before. My dreams were crushed. I cried more then, than I think I ever had up until that point. I knew that the next day I had to go to school and see my friends and the excitement on their faces when they saw on the outside of the glass doors of the gym their names where they had been the chosen ones. I didn’t even want my face to be shown at school the following day, as I feared that quite possibly a small tear might trickle down my face or worse, that one tear could turn into a multitude of tears that could make me feel humiliated in front of my peers. Luckily, though, that didn’t happen. God turned what I thought was complete brokenness into something beautiful. He allowed some of my close friends to take me out back at church on that following Wednesday night and kick a soccer ball at me to see if I could catch it, which I naturally could. The next day I was standing in the middle of the soccer field as the newest member and starting goalie for the JV soccer team at the high school. I was incredibly confused because this was the first time I had ever even thought that soccer would be a sport that I would be a part of. Little did I know that through people giving me a chance as a soccer player that it would turn into something better than I could have ever thought possible. I was then able to play a couple of seasons of travel soccer where I met some amazing friends and had the opportunity to play a year of Varsity soccer as well.
This is just one example from my life showing how God turned brokenness into blessings. Let’s read the text and see how this same pattern is found in the the Old Testament.
If you have your Bibles turn with me to Genesis chapter 29: 15-30. “After Jacob had stayed with him for a whole month, 15 Laban said to him, “Just because you are a relative of mine, should you work for me for nothing? Tell me what your wages should be.” 16 Now Laban had two daughters; the name of the older was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel. 17 Leah had weak[a] eyes, but Rachel had a lovely figure and was beautiful. 18 Jacob was in love with Rachel and said, “I’ll work for you seven years in return for your younger daughter Rachel.” 19 Laban said, “It’s better that I give her to you than to some other man. Stay here with me.” 20 So Jacob served seven years to get Rachel, but they seemed like only a few days to him because of his love for her. 21 Then Jacob said to Laban, “Give me my wife. My time is completed, and I want to lay with her.” 22 So Laban brought together all the people of the place and gave a feast. 23 But when evening came, he took his daughter Leah and brought her to Jacob, and Jacob lay with her. 24 And Laban gave his servant Zilpah to his daughter as her attendant. 25 When morning came, there was Leah! So Jacob said to Laban, “What is this you have done to me? I served you for Rachel, didn’t I? Why have you deceived me?” 26 Laban replied, “It is not our custom here to give the younger daughter in marriage before the older one. 27 Finish this daughter’s bridal week; then we will give you the younger one also, in return for another seven years of work.” 28 And Jacob did so. He finished the week with Leah, and then Laban gave him his daughter Rachel to be his wife. 29 Laban gave his servant Bilhah to his daughter Rachel as her attendant. 30 Jacob lay with Rachel also, and his love for Rachel was greater than his love for Leah. And he worked for Laban another seven years.”
In order for us to place this story in the proper context and to allow each of us to understand the importance of this story, we are going to look at some of the background information that will make the puzzle pieces fit together. Today we are going to focus on the story of Leah and Rachel and their relationship with Jacob. Jacob’s father Isaac has become really sick and can’t see very well. While Esau, Jacob’s older twin brother was out in the field, Jacob, with the help of his mother, got the blessing which was meant for the oldest son from his father Isaac. After death threats from his brother, Jacob left town and headed to his uncle’s house. When he got near his uncles home he met a beautiful young woman named Rachel at the well. Several times throughout the Old Testament a well seems to be the meeting place for men and women. Jacob falls in love with Rachel and then Jacob is taken to meet Rachel’s father. This story of Leah and Rachel continues in an unusual way. We already see this pain and tension in Leah’s life, the eldest daughter of Laban is unwanted. Not only is she unwanted by her father who just wants her married off, but she is also unwanted and unloved by her husband who is madly in love with her younger sister. Take a moment and put yourself in Leah’s shoes. Imagine being given in marriage to a man or woman who doesn’t love you. Imagine how that would make you feel. There are plenty of other contemporary versions of who the Leah’s of today might be, Imagine being married to a man or woman who is cheating on you but you are so in love with them that you hurt yourself looking past their faults because you think that one day the cheating may end. Imagine being the elderly man who is left in a nursing home with no one to love him and care for him who wants more than anything to see his children and grandchildren and to hear about their lives. Imagine being the woman who is left to raise her three sons all on her own and who has to work several jobs in order to make ends meet. Imagine being called into your boss’s office only to be told that you have lost your job and you must go home and share this news of being unwanted by your company to your wife and children. Imagine being that teenage girl who finds her worth in having sexual relationships with guys because that is where she feels the most loved and who becomes pregnant while in high school and so as a result has to deal with the ridicule, stares, and whispers from friends who she thought she could trust. Imagine that you are the 14 year old boy who is experimenting with drugs and alcohol in order to mask the pain from being bullied at school. We can all put ourselves in some of these shoes. Maybe we have been there, maybe we are in that dark place now, and we don’t know how to get out of it. I’m here this morning to tell you that there is freedom for the captive. God doesn’t want us to sit here in the shackles that keep us from understanding and accepting the grace that God has to offer.
The tense relationship of Leah and Rachel continues in a way that we may not expect. Neither Leah nor Rachel were able to have any children in the beginning. They were both barren. God did a beautiful thing in Leah’s life though. Genesis chapter 29: 31 says, “When the Lord saw that Leah was not loved, he opened her womb, but Rachel was barren.” In Genesis chapter 30, Leah’s story continues where we see in the names of her children the pain that she is feeling in her life. When Leah had her first son, she was so filled with joy that she named him Reuben because The Lord had seen her misery and she felt that surely her husband would love her now. She had another son, this time naming him Simeon and she said, “Because the Lord heard that I am not loved, he gave me this one too.” A third time Leah became pregnant, she had yet another son who she named Levi and said; “Now at last my husband will become attached to me because I have given him three sons.” Leah became pregnant a fourth time and said, “This time I will praise the Lord.” So she named him Judah. After a while, Leah became pregnant with Jacob’s fifth son who she named Isacchar because she felt God had rewarded her for being faithful. When Leah gave Jacob a sixth son, she said, “God has presented me with a precious gift. This time my husband will treat me with honor because I have given him six sons.” Because of this, she named him Zebulun. Sometime later, Leah gave birth to a daughter and named her Dinah. The names of Leah’s children are indications of the pain that she was feeling as a result of being unloved. It goes on to say that Rachel was jealous of her sister and she went as far as to say to Jacob, “Give me children or I will die.” Rachel then offered Jacob her maid servant as a substitute and she became pregnant and gave her a son. Rachel was still not able to produce children which caused her to feel as though she was defeated. Earlier we placed ourselves in the shoes of Leah, and now I think that it is time that we do the same with our character Rachel. Rachel was beautiful, and loved by everyone around her. She was loved by her father, and her husband Jacob was madly in love with her. Rachel, however, found her lack of self-worth in her inability to birth children. In the Old Testament, having children, especially sons, was a sign of blessings from God. The lack of children was thought of as being a curse from God, and that some sin had been committed in order for her to become barren. On the other hand, having sons was a sign that a woman was blessed for being faithful to God. So you can see here how Rachel would feel discouraged at the fact that her sister, Leah, was producing sons, while Rachel up until this point was unable to produce any children. I’m sure each of us has someone in our lives who has not been able to have children and we have seen the pain and shame that they place on themselves. We see these women and they hurt. They hurt not only as they see newborn babies, but each year on Mother’s Day they are reminded of this pain as well. When they see a mother and her children, I’m sure that a part of them questions why God has blessed the other woman and seems to have forgotten them in their time of pain and heartache. This pain of not being able to have children goes deeper than many of us can imagine. How does this relate to our lives today? What about the teenage girl who is contemplating suicide because she doesn’t feel accepted within her group of peers even though she is beautiful, talented, and smart? What about the mom who tries everything she can to raise her children in the ways of The Lord but they still turn out to be rebellious and make harmful decisions? What about the preacher and his wife who try to become pregnant and can’t have children? And what about the Army soldier who has his wife cheat on him when he is doing everything that he can to protect our country? Not only can most of us relate to Leah, most of us can relate to Rachel as well. Finally God opened Rachel’s womb and allowed her to give birth to a son. She said, “God has taken away my disgrace.” Rachel placed so much of her worth on having sons that she forgot that her worth comes from The Lord. Where do we place our self-worth? Do we allow God to fill the voids when the world tells us that we are not good enough? Do we allow God to heal the brokenness of our lives, or do we wallow in the pain only to feel defeated once again?
If you haven’t been able to relate to anyone thus far, maybe you can relate to Jacob. How many of us have ever been deceived? How many of us have thought we were getting something that we in reality didn’t end up getting? This past semester, I was on EBay looking up a pair of shoes. The shoes that I was looking at are called TOMS. Basically if you don’t know the organization, TOMS is a company where you buy a pair of shoes and then they send a pair of shoes to a needy child in another country who doesn’t have any shoes. I thought that I was being smart, however, and found this ‘too good to be true deal’ on EBay. The deal was that you could get any pair of solid color TOMS shoes for $9.99. I bought into this scam, where I purchased 2 pair of shoes and I was so excited. I shared this bargain with my friends and luckily they didn’t buy into this trick. A couple of days later, I got an email from the company saying that the shoes that I had ordered were not up to par but that they would be giving me a refund. Luckily, I got my money back, but that is just one example of things being too good to be true. As we look at Jacob’s story, think of the disappointment he must have felt being deceived by his own father in law. Jacob worked really hard to get the woman of his dreams only to wake up from his wedding night to see that he had been given Leah instead of Rachel. I’m sure that he was not only disappointed but I bet that he was mad as well. How many of you have ever felt like you were in Jacob’s shoes? One of the worst feelings is the feeling of being lied to or deceived. This could be anything. It could be a job where the job description does not actually fit what the job entailed. It could be a relationship where the person that you are dating or even married to is not who you thought that they were when you met them. It could be a friend who is using you instead of being the friend that he should be. It could even be an elderly person who thinks her finances are being taken care of by her children but in reality her finances are not being taken care of like they should be. Maybe today you are the family who has been tricked and hurt by a church who you thought that you could trust but in reality you got hurt in the process of serving God.
Or maybe you’re Laban. Maybe you are the one who is causing the pain for other people. Maybe you are the one who isn’t showing his children the love that they deserve. Maybe you are the one deceiving people and lying to people. Maybe you are the boss at work who isn’t giving equal wages because of gender. Maybe you are the friend who gossips behind the others back as a way to cause pain for that person. Maybe you are the teenager who doesn’t respect her parents even though they love you unconditionally, or maybe you are the church member who discriminates against people who are different than yourself.
No matter where we are in life, God wants more than anything to give us freedom. God wants us to accept the grace that is being offered to us. The Creator of the Universe wants us to feel the love that is being given to us.
We have seen the Biblical examples as well as modern day examples of how God can move us from a place of complete brokenness into a place of beauty and blessings. This next story is one that shows the awesome healing power that can be found in the arms of Christ.
May 28, 2008 was a normal day in the life of the Chapman family, until that evening when their 17 year old son Will Franklin was pulling out of the driveway and accidently struck and killed his 5 year old sister Maria Sue the youngest of the Chapman’s daughters. The family went through a very dark period of time where they didn’t know how they would make it to the next day. In a recent interview, Steven Curtis Chapman commented on how God began to heal their family in 2011 by saying, “We feel like morning is really starting to break for us and we’re beginning to sense there is new life starting to sprout. The real morning is still yet to come when we finally get to see Maria again in heaven, but as a family and individually we’re beginning to feel like there’s oxygen coming back into our lungs. My wife talks about it in terms of being in a forest for the last several years; in a very dense, dark forest. It’s only been recently that we started to feel like God is standing on the edge of that forest saying, ‘I want to bring you out of the forest, and your daughter is ahead of you. She's a greater part of your future than she is of your past. And I'm leading you out, I'm leading you into this new place.’ It’s a new beginning for us and I really felt like I wanted to say that.” A recent song by Chapman written soon after his daughter’s death will I think bring some peace into our lives today, “Buried deep beneath all our broken dreams, we have this hope. Out of these ashes, beauty will rise, and we will dance among the ruins we will see it with our own eyes. Out of these ashes beauty will rise, for we know Joy is coming in the morning. In the morning, beauty will rise.” Since the death of his daughter, Steven has written several songs about how God can take our brokenness and turn it into something more beautiful than we can ever imagine.
The Chapman Family found hope in the same way that our Biblical characters found their hope In the songs of our lives our stories don’t have to end in the middle of the chorus. God has a second verse with new beginnings and unending joys just a few measures away.
The story of Leah doesn’t end where I left off. Even though Leah felt unloved by her father, husband, and sister, God found her in her brokenness and held her in the loving arms like a mother holding her newborn child. God blessed her and if you trace back the lineage of Christ, it can be traced to Leah’s son Judah. How awesome is that? That the son of God can be traced back to a woman who was so unloved and unfavorable among her people yet God looked at her and made her feel worthy and beautiful. God does the same thing with us. God looks past our brokenness and our hard times and holds us up when we feel as though we can’t stand on our own two feet.
I have a challenge for each one of us here today. Be sensitive to what God is showing you. You may be the person who is called to love on someone who feels broken and that they can’t keep going on. You may be the one that God is calling to send a note of encouragement to someone this week or perhaps God is calling you to pay a visit to one of our shut-ins who cannot get out. Listen for the voice of our awesome God. Love on those who are unloved. Sacrifice so that others may feel the love of Christ. Mother Teresa once said, “True love causes pain. Jesus, in order to give us the proof of his love, died on the cross. A mother in order to give birth to her baby; has to suffer. If you really love one another, you will not be able to avoid making sacrifices.”
I don’t know where you are today or if you can relate to this Bible story at all, but I’m confident that some of you are at a place where you feel broken and you want the peace that Christ has to offer to each one of us today. Right now, were going to do something a little different than many of you are used to. We are going to spend some time at the altar before the Lord Almighty. Many of us are struggling so much that we don’t know how we are going to make it to tomorrow. Right now, we are going to stand and sing our hymn of invitation. If you have a decision that you need to make, Derik will be here at the front to greet you. Some of you may feel God calling you to accept Jesus for the first time, others may feel called to transfer their membership from another congregation, and others of you may just need to come to the altar to pray for God to heal some area of brokenness in your life. The altar is open, please come. Let God heal your deepest wounds. Step out of your comfort zones and let the Ultimate Healer and Compassionate Friend show you what true freedom is in your life. Let God break the chains of insecurity, brokenness, fear, pain, suffering, sickness, loneliness or whatever other emotion you may be feeling this morning. God wants more than anything for us to walk in the Beauty that has been laid before us. Let us pray.
Patient and loving God, Compassionate Friend, Lover of our souls, bring freedom to this congregation this morning. Bring peace to the brokenhearted and comfort for the hurting. Allow us to find healing in your tender hands. Show us what you would have us to do. We love you God. Amen.
Will you pray with me, “May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be pleasing in you sight O Lord My God, my rock and my redeemer. Amen”
Have you ever been at a place in your life where you felt absolutely defeated? I’ve been there once. Since most of you know me, you know that I grew up around softball my entire life. Whether it was going to watch my aunt Jennifer or my cousin Lindsay play or playing myself from kindergarten through most of my high school years, I was always at the ball field. Freshman year of high school came and I had gone to just about every softball conditioning there was. I felt as though my tryouts were going well and that I had a pretty good chance of making the team. The last day of tryouts came and went and later that evening I found out that I hadn’t made the team after all. Tears streamed down my face and I felt the most lost and confused I had ever felt before. My dreams were crushed. I cried more then, than I think I ever had up until that point. I knew that the next day I had to go to school and see my friends and the excitement on their faces when they saw on the outside of the glass doors of the gym their names where they had been the chosen ones. I didn’t even want my face to be shown at school the following day, as I feared that quite possibly a small tear might trickle down my face or worse, that one tear could turn into a multitude of tears that could make me feel humiliated in front of my peers. Luckily, though, that didn’t happen. God turned what I thought was complete brokenness into something beautiful. He allowed some of my close friends to take me out back at church on that following Wednesday night and kick a soccer ball at me to see if I could catch it, which I naturally could. The next day I was standing in the middle of the soccer field as the newest member and starting goalie for the JV soccer team at the high school. I was incredibly confused because this was the first time I had ever even thought that soccer would be a sport that I would be a part of. Little did I know that through people giving me a chance as a soccer player that it would turn into something better than I could have ever thought possible. I was then able to play a couple of seasons of travel soccer where I met some amazing friends and had the opportunity to play a year of Varsity soccer as well.
This is just one example from my life showing how God turned brokenness into blessings. Let’s read the text and see how this same pattern is found in the the Old Testament.
If you have your Bibles turn with me to Genesis chapter 29: 15-30. “After Jacob had stayed with him for a whole month, 15 Laban said to him, “Just because you are a relative of mine, should you work for me for nothing? Tell me what your wages should be.” 16 Now Laban had two daughters; the name of the older was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel. 17 Leah had weak[a] eyes, but Rachel had a lovely figure and was beautiful. 18 Jacob was in love with Rachel and said, “I’ll work for you seven years in return for your younger daughter Rachel.” 19 Laban said, “It’s better that I give her to you than to some other man. Stay here with me.” 20 So Jacob served seven years to get Rachel, but they seemed like only a few days to him because of his love for her. 21 Then Jacob said to Laban, “Give me my wife. My time is completed, and I want to lay with her.” 22 So Laban brought together all the people of the place and gave a feast. 23 But when evening came, he took his daughter Leah and brought her to Jacob, and Jacob lay with her. 24 And Laban gave his servant Zilpah to his daughter as her attendant. 25 When morning came, there was Leah! So Jacob said to Laban, “What is this you have done to me? I served you for Rachel, didn’t I? Why have you deceived me?” 26 Laban replied, “It is not our custom here to give the younger daughter in marriage before the older one. 27 Finish this daughter’s bridal week; then we will give you the younger one also, in return for another seven years of work.” 28 And Jacob did so. He finished the week with Leah, and then Laban gave him his daughter Rachel to be his wife. 29 Laban gave his servant Bilhah to his daughter Rachel as her attendant. 30 Jacob lay with Rachel also, and his love for Rachel was greater than his love for Leah. And he worked for Laban another seven years.”
In order for us to place this story in the proper context and to allow each of us to understand the importance of this story, we are going to look at some of the background information that will make the puzzle pieces fit together. Today we are going to focus on the story of Leah and Rachel and their relationship with Jacob. Jacob’s father Isaac has become really sick and can’t see very well. While Esau, Jacob’s older twin brother was out in the field, Jacob, with the help of his mother, got the blessing which was meant for the oldest son from his father Isaac. After death threats from his brother, Jacob left town and headed to his uncle’s house. When he got near his uncles home he met a beautiful young woman named Rachel at the well. Several times throughout the Old Testament a well seems to be the meeting place for men and women. Jacob falls in love with Rachel and then Jacob is taken to meet Rachel’s father. This story of Leah and Rachel continues in an unusual way. We already see this pain and tension in Leah’s life, the eldest daughter of Laban is unwanted. Not only is she unwanted by her father who just wants her married off, but she is also unwanted and unloved by her husband who is madly in love with her younger sister. Take a moment and put yourself in Leah’s shoes. Imagine being given in marriage to a man or woman who doesn’t love you. Imagine how that would make you feel. There are plenty of other contemporary versions of who the Leah’s of today might be, Imagine being married to a man or woman who is cheating on you but you are so in love with them that you hurt yourself looking past their faults because you think that one day the cheating may end. Imagine being the elderly man who is left in a nursing home with no one to love him and care for him who wants more than anything to see his children and grandchildren and to hear about their lives. Imagine being the woman who is left to raise her three sons all on her own and who has to work several jobs in order to make ends meet. Imagine being called into your boss’s office only to be told that you have lost your job and you must go home and share this news of being unwanted by your company to your wife and children. Imagine being that teenage girl who finds her worth in having sexual relationships with guys because that is where she feels the most loved and who becomes pregnant while in high school and so as a result has to deal with the ridicule, stares, and whispers from friends who she thought she could trust. Imagine that you are the 14 year old boy who is experimenting with drugs and alcohol in order to mask the pain from being bullied at school. We can all put ourselves in some of these shoes. Maybe we have been there, maybe we are in that dark place now, and we don’t know how to get out of it. I’m here this morning to tell you that there is freedom for the captive. God doesn’t want us to sit here in the shackles that keep us from understanding and accepting the grace that God has to offer.
The tense relationship of Leah and Rachel continues in a way that we may not expect. Neither Leah nor Rachel were able to have any children in the beginning. They were both barren. God did a beautiful thing in Leah’s life though. Genesis chapter 29: 31 says, “When the Lord saw that Leah was not loved, he opened her womb, but Rachel was barren.” In Genesis chapter 30, Leah’s story continues where we see in the names of her children the pain that she is feeling in her life. When Leah had her first son, she was so filled with joy that she named him Reuben because The Lord had seen her misery and she felt that surely her husband would love her now. She had another son, this time naming him Simeon and she said, “Because the Lord heard that I am not loved, he gave me this one too.” A third time Leah became pregnant, she had yet another son who she named Levi and said; “Now at last my husband will become attached to me because I have given him three sons.” Leah became pregnant a fourth time and said, “This time I will praise the Lord.” So she named him Judah. After a while, Leah became pregnant with Jacob’s fifth son who she named Isacchar because she felt God had rewarded her for being faithful. When Leah gave Jacob a sixth son, she said, “God has presented me with a precious gift. This time my husband will treat me with honor because I have given him six sons.” Because of this, she named him Zebulun. Sometime later, Leah gave birth to a daughter and named her Dinah. The names of Leah’s children are indications of the pain that she was feeling as a result of being unloved. It goes on to say that Rachel was jealous of her sister and she went as far as to say to Jacob, “Give me children or I will die.” Rachel then offered Jacob her maid servant as a substitute and she became pregnant and gave her a son. Rachel was still not able to produce children which caused her to feel as though she was defeated. Earlier we placed ourselves in the shoes of Leah, and now I think that it is time that we do the same with our character Rachel. Rachel was beautiful, and loved by everyone around her. She was loved by her father, and her husband Jacob was madly in love with her. Rachel, however, found her lack of self-worth in her inability to birth children. In the Old Testament, having children, especially sons, was a sign of blessings from God. The lack of children was thought of as being a curse from God, and that some sin had been committed in order for her to become barren. On the other hand, having sons was a sign that a woman was blessed for being faithful to God. So you can see here how Rachel would feel discouraged at the fact that her sister, Leah, was producing sons, while Rachel up until this point was unable to produce any children. I’m sure each of us has someone in our lives who has not been able to have children and we have seen the pain and shame that they place on themselves. We see these women and they hurt. They hurt not only as they see newborn babies, but each year on Mother’s Day they are reminded of this pain as well. When they see a mother and her children, I’m sure that a part of them questions why God has blessed the other woman and seems to have forgotten them in their time of pain and heartache. This pain of not being able to have children goes deeper than many of us can imagine. How does this relate to our lives today? What about the teenage girl who is contemplating suicide because she doesn’t feel accepted within her group of peers even though she is beautiful, talented, and smart? What about the mom who tries everything she can to raise her children in the ways of The Lord but they still turn out to be rebellious and make harmful decisions? What about the preacher and his wife who try to become pregnant and can’t have children? And what about the Army soldier who has his wife cheat on him when he is doing everything that he can to protect our country? Not only can most of us relate to Leah, most of us can relate to Rachel as well. Finally God opened Rachel’s womb and allowed her to give birth to a son. She said, “God has taken away my disgrace.” Rachel placed so much of her worth on having sons that she forgot that her worth comes from The Lord. Where do we place our self-worth? Do we allow God to fill the voids when the world tells us that we are not good enough? Do we allow God to heal the brokenness of our lives, or do we wallow in the pain only to feel defeated once again?
If you haven’t been able to relate to anyone thus far, maybe you can relate to Jacob. How many of us have ever been deceived? How many of us have thought we were getting something that we in reality didn’t end up getting? This past semester, I was on EBay looking up a pair of shoes. The shoes that I was looking at are called TOMS. Basically if you don’t know the organization, TOMS is a company where you buy a pair of shoes and then they send a pair of shoes to a needy child in another country who doesn’t have any shoes. I thought that I was being smart, however, and found this ‘too good to be true deal’ on EBay. The deal was that you could get any pair of solid color TOMS shoes for $9.99. I bought into this scam, where I purchased 2 pair of shoes and I was so excited. I shared this bargain with my friends and luckily they didn’t buy into this trick. A couple of days later, I got an email from the company saying that the shoes that I had ordered were not up to par but that they would be giving me a refund. Luckily, I got my money back, but that is just one example of things being too good to be true. As we look at Jacob’s story, think of the disappointment he must have felt being deceived by his own father in law. Jacob worked really hard to get the woman of his dreams only to wake up from his wedding night to see that he had been given Leah instead of Rachel. I’m sure that he was not only disappointed but I bet that he was mad as well. How many of you have ever felt like you were in Jacob’s shoes? One of the worst feelings is the feeling of being lied to or deceived. This could be anything. It could be a job where the job description does not actually fit what the job entailed. It could be a relationship where the person that you are dating or even married to is not who you thought that they were when you met them. It could be a friend who is using you instead of being the friend that he should be. It could even be an elderly person who thinks her finances are being taken care of by her children but in reality her finances are not being taken care of like they should be. Maybe today you are the family who has been tricked and hurt by a church who you thought that you could trust but in reality you got hurt in the process of serving God.
Or maybe you’re Laban. Maybe you are the one who is causing the pain for other people. Maybe you are the one who isn’t showing his children the love that they deserve. Maybe you are the one deceiving people and lying to people. Maybe you are the boss at work who isn’t giving equal wages because of gender. Maybe you are the friend who gossips behind the others back as a way to cause pain for that person. Maybe you are the teenager who doesn’t respect her parents even though they love you unconditionally, or maybe you are the church member who discriminates against people who are different than yourself.
No matter where we are in life, God wants more than anything to give us freedom. God wants us to accept the grace that is being offered to us. The Creator of the Universe wants us to feel the love that is being given to us.
We have seen the Biblical examples as well as modern day examples of how God can move us from a place of complete brokenness into a place of beauty and blessings. This next story is one that shows the awesome healing power that can be found in the arms of Christ.
May 28, 2008 was a normal day in the life of the Chapman family, until that evening when their 17 year old son Will Franklin was pulling out of the driveway and accidently struck and killed his 5 year old sister Maria Sue the youngest of the Chapman’s daughters. The family went through a very dark period of time where they didn’t know how they would make it to the next day. In a recent interview, Steven Curtis Chapman commented on how God began to heal their family in 2011 by saying, “We feel like morning is really starting to break for us and we’re beginning to sense there is new life starting to sprout. The real morning is still yet to come when we finally get to see Maria again in heaven, but as a family and individually we’re beginning to feel like there’s oxygen coming back into our lungs. My wife talks about it in terms of being in a forest for the last several years; in a very dense, dark forest. It’s only been recently that we started to feel like God is standing on the edge of that forest saying, ‘I want to bring you out of the forest, and your daughter is ahead of you. She's a greater part of your future than she is of your past. And I'm leading you out, I'm leading you into this new place.’ It’s a new beginning for us and I really felt like I wanted to say that.” A recent song by Chapman written soon after his daughter’s death will I think bring some peace into our lives today, “Buried deep beneath all our broken dreams, we have this hope. Out of these ashes, beauty will rise, and we will dance among the ruins we will see it with our own eyes. Out of these ashes beauty will rise, for we know Joy is coming in the morning. In the morning, beauty will rise.” Since the death of his daughter, Steven has written several songs about how God can take our brokenness and turn it into something more beautiful than we can ever imagine.
The Chapman Family found hope in the same way that our Biblical characters found their hope In the songs of our lives our stories don’t have to end in the middle of the chorus. God has a second verse with new beginnings and unending joys just a few measures away.
The story of Leah doesn’t end where I left off. Even though Leah felt unloved by her father, husband, and sister, God found her in her brokenness and held her in the loving arms like a mother holding her newborn child. God blessed her and if you trace back the lineage of Christ, it can be traced to Leah’s son Judah. How awesome is that? That the son of God can be traced back to a woman who was so unloved and unfavorable among her people yet God looked at her and made her feel worthy and beautiful. God does the same thing with us. God looks past our brokenness and our hard times and holds us up when we feel as though we can’t stand on our own two feet.
I have a challenge for each one of us here today. Be sensitive to what God is showing you. You may be the person who is called to love on someone who feels broken and that they can’t keep going on. You may be the one that God is calling to send a note of encouragement to someone this week or perhaps God is calling you to pay a visit to one of our shut-ins who cannot get out. Listen for the voice of our awesome God. Love on those who are unloved. Sacrifice so that others may feel the love of Christ. Mother Teresa once said, “True love causes pain. Jesus, in order to give us the proof of his love, died on the cross. A mother in order to give birth to her baby; has to suffer. If you really love one another, you will not be able to avoid making sacrifices.”
I don’t know where you are today or if you can relate to this Bible story at all, but I’m confident that some of you are at a place where you feel broken and you want the peace that Christ has to offer to each one of us today. Right now, were going to do something a little different than many of you are used to. We are going to spend some time at the altar before the Lord Almighty. Many of us are struggling so much that we don’t know how we are going to make it to tomorrow. Right now, we are going to stand and sing our hymn of invitation. If you have a decision that you need to make, Derik will be here at the front to greet you. Some of you may feel God calling you to accept Jesus for the first time, others may feel called to transfer their membership from another congregation, and others of you may just need to come to the altar to pray for God to heal some area of brokenness in your life. The altar is open, please come. Let God heal your deepest wounds. Step out of your comfort zones and let the Ultimate Healer and Compassionate Friend show you what true freedom is in your life. Let God break the chains of insecurity, brokenness, fear, pain, suffering, sickness, loneliness or whatever other emotion you may be feeling this morning. God wants more than anything for us to walk in the Beauty that has been laid before us. Let us pray.
Patient and loving God, Compassionate Friend, Lover of our souls, bring freedom to this congregation this morning. Bring peace to the brokenhearted and comfort for the hurting. Allow us to find healing in your tender hands. Show us what you would have us to do. We love you God. Amen.
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